Do you Cosleep with your children?

Yes, my babies will always be welcomed in my bed. As adults we cosleep with one another and it’s considered normal right? So why when a baby or young child who is new to earth, wants to cosleep, is it a problem? It’s not!

Laying down with your kids until they fall asleep is also not a bad habit, but yet a great one. They grow fast and before you know it there will be independence and we will miss the days of them needing our hand to drift safely to sleep. STOP caring what others think! Do what feels right to you!

Do you have the kids do chores? And Why?

Yes, I had my son start chores when he was a toddler. He currently has a list of chores that he does and he is turning 7. He makes his bed, takes out recyclables, helps unpack all groceries or shopping bags, unloads the dishwasher, vacuums the house, and sometimes helps sort socks or laundry. I started having my daughter who is 2 also help with things like cooking prep, dishes, cleaning up toys and taking her dishes to the sink with her brother. Chores are important for children. If they can operate a smart phone, they can operate things like a vacuum or dishwasher.

Chores help with so many things for kids such as:

- feeling needed -gives them a sense of importance -teaches them independence and responsibility - builds character - Teaches teamwork.

Sample chores you can choose from-

Age 1-3 Put toys away, put dirty clothes in the hamper, brush teeth, help set the table, dust, dress themselves, take dishes to sink after meals and snacks, help put away laundry, help with watering plants.

Age 3-4 All the previous, make bed, help clean up bedroom, clean their own mess (spilled food water etc.), Put away dishes from dishwasher, help cook, bring in mail, feed animals.

Age 4-5 All previous, vacuum or sweep, help with yard work, help put away groceries, set the table.

Age 6-8 All previous, help separate or fold laundry, take out the trash & recyclables, wash/dry dishes, start to make simple meals, clean up after pets, basic gardening.

Age 8+ All previous, clean the car, mow the lawn, babysit, start to cook, do their own laundry, clean the bathroom, clean out the fridge.

Momma guilt; is it real? Do you have it?

YES!!! Mom guilt is very real. Momma’s bear the burden of a lot on our shoulders i.e., work, kids, family, wife responsibility, and all the other things. Mom guilt is feeling the failure or guilt. Questioning yourself are you doing everything right or wrong? Things like should I make more nutritious meals for the family? Should I contribute more? Should I make more time for my loved ones or family? Should I make me time when I have children who want to be with me? These are all normal questions. I’ve been told that if you're asking yourself any of these questions, you're doing a great job. Taking time to indulge in your interests gives you that guilty feeling of not actively caring for your family and focusing on you aka mom guilt. Everybody needs something from mom and so it’s important to make sure that you prioritize time for you so that stress and ressentiment doesn’t start to build.

Make time for you, talk to your partner, husband or friend. Share the burden, talking about it can help you get it off your chest. Mom guilt is normal, so make sure to schedule time for yourself. You are the person in the mirror who is responsible for your happiness. (that’s always been a favorite quote of mine) Stay reasonable, don’t be a hero just be a mom and do your best :)

How to create structure at home? Do you have a schedule?

Structure is so important for the littles at home. Structure helps kids feel safe, secure and develop self-discipline. It helps them with cooperation, responsibility and controlling their behaviors. Structure is having routines and rules to make the days more predictable for children. With this, they know what they are going to be expecting or what’s to come next.

My son who is almost 7 knows the routine that we have on weekdays. After school he comes home, unpacks his backpack and gets snack. He has free play time and then 7:30pm is bath time. After bath he reads, and we get ready for bed. Sometimes I read too, or we listen to the calm app for meditation or sleep stories. The days may vary a tad but give or take he knows what’s to be expected. He knows that when I come home with groceries, he’s expected to help start unpacking them. The more that you stick to routine the more they get used to it.